You Don’t Have to Choose Just One Version of Yourself

You Don’t Have to Choose Just One Version of Yourself

Today, I made a video that begins with me surrounded by crystal singing bowls before the camera swings around to reveal a room full of cosplay costumes.

The sound was a mix of Enya and Teach Me How to Dougie, which might be the most accurate representation of my personality anybody has ever created.

One side of me loves meditation, sound healing, crystals, Reiki and exploring my spiritual path. Another side loves transforming into different characters, making people laugh and appearing on the internet dressed as everything from a Disney princess to a slightly unhinged witch.

Neither side is pretending. They are both completely me.

I think we’re often made to feel as though we have to decide who we are and then remain that person all the time. Once people place us into a certain box, anything outside of it seems to confuse them.

If you’re spiritual, you’re expected to be calm and serious. If you’re interested in healing, you’re supposed to speak softly, dress in neutral colours and float peacefully through life without ever being chaotic, sarcastic or ridiculous.

But healing doesn’t remove your personality.

It isn’t about becoming a quieter, more acceptable version of yourself. It’s about becoming comfortable enough to stop hiding the parts that don’t fit neatly together.

I can create a peaceful space for somebody and still laugh until I can’t breathe. I can use singing bowls and tuning forks, then put on a costume and spend an evening being completely daft. I can be deeply spiritual without taking myself seriously every minute of the day.

None of those things cancel each other out.

In fact, I think they belong together more than people realise. Creativity can be healing. Laughter can be healing. Dressing as somebody else for a little while can help you rediscover parts of yourself that became buried beneath responsibility, expectation and survival.

Healing isn’t only found in silence. Sometimes it’s found in play.

For a long time, many of us learn to separate ourselves into versions that other people find easier to understand. We decide which parts are appropriate for work, relationships, family or social media. We make ourselves smaller, simpler and more predictable so nobody thinks we are too much or doesn’t know what to make of us.

But we were never meant to be one-dimensional.

You can be soft and powerful. Spiritual and sarcastic. Sensible and completely chaotic. You can hold space for somebody’s pain and still be the person who turns up dressed as the Mad Hatter.

Being one doesn’t make the other less genuine.

Nova Rising Soul is part of me, but it isn’t the only part. My cosplay account is part of me too. They may look completely different from the outside, but both come from the same place: creativity, connection, freedom and wanting people to feel something.

One creates moments of calm. The other creates moments of joy.

Both matter.

I don’t want to build a healing space that requires me to polish away everything fun, strange or unexpected about myself. I don’t believe people need another perfectly curated person pretending to have life completely figured out. They need real people. People who can offer comfort while still being honest about their own lives. People who understand that growth can be meaningful without becoming solemn.

You don’t need to choose the version of yourself that makes the most sense to everybody else.

Let your interests clash. Let your personality surprise people. Let the calm, spiritual part of you sit beside the loud, playful part without asking either one to leave.

You are allowed to be all of it.

And if somebody can’t understand how your different sides belong together, that doesn’t mean you need to separate them. It simply means they haven’t yet understood the full picture.

I am not two different people.

I am one whole person who contains more than one kind of magic.

Daily Affirmation

Nova x