From The Wildflowers

When You Stop Forcing and Start Trusting

Some things in life are meant to be worked for, and some things become exhausting because we’re trying far too hard to make them happen. I’m learning there’s a difference.
I’ve always been someone who wants to do something. If there’s a problem, I want to fix it. If there’s something I want, I want to work towards it. If something feels uncertain, I want to find the answer. Preferably immediately, because patience has never exactly been my strongest personality trait.
But lately I’ve been thinking about how much energy we spend trying to control things that were never entirely ours to control in the first place. Other people, timing, opportunities, outcomes, the future. We can influence those things, of course. We can show up, communicate, work hard, take chances and make choices. But eventually, we reach the point where we’ve done our bit and that’s where trust has to begin.

I used to think trusting life meant convincing yourself that everything was going to turn out perfectly. It doesn’t, sometimes things don’t work out. Sometimes something we desperately wanted disappears. Sometimes a door closes when we were absolutely certain it was supposed to open and sometimes we don’t understand why until much later.

Trust isn’t saying, everything will happen exactly the way I want. It’s saying, whatever happens, I trust myself to find my way through it.

That feels much more real to me, because I can’t promise myself that life won’t disappoint me. I can promise myself that I won’t abandon myself when it does.

There’s a strange thing that happens when we really want something. We start trying to make every little sign mean that it’s working. We analyse, we overthink, we push, we try another way and then another. Before we know it, we’re putting so much energy into trying to make something fit that we’ve forgotten to ask whether it actually does.

That’s where today’s affirmation comes in: I trust what is meant for me to find me.

For me, that doesn’t mean sitting around waiting for fate to knock on the door. It means meeting life halfway. I’ll show up. I’ll make the effort. I’ll take the risk. I’ll say yes. I’ll try. But I don’t have to drag something towards me that is determined to move in the opposite direction. There has to be movement from the other side too.

I love the words clarity, consistency and ease in today’s affirmation because they’re things we often overlook. We’re so used to hearing that everything worthwhile is difficult that sometimes we start believing difficulty itself must mean something is valuable.
But ease doesn’t mean laziness, and alignment doesn’t mean never encountering obstacles. It means that underneath the work, there is something that feels right. There is movement. There is reciprocity. There is enough consistency that you’re not constantly wondering whether you imagined the whole bloody thing. There’s room to breathe.

This is the part I find hardest, because chasing feels productive. Waiting feels terrifying. If I’m doing something, I feel like I’m controlling the outcome.

But sometimes chasing isn’t progress. Sometimes it’s fear wearing running shoes.
Fear that if we stop pushing, the thing will disappear. Fear that if we don’t keep proving ourselves, we’ll be forgotten. Fear that if we loosen our grip for even a second, we’ll lose whatever we’re desperately trying to hold onto.
And I keep coming back to one uncomfortable question: if something disappears the moment I stop forcing it, was it ever really mine to hold?

Oof.
I know.
I didn’t particularly enjoy that one either.

Maybe trust is simply leaving some space. Space for people to show us who they are. Space for opportunities to appear. Space for plans to change. Space for something completely unexpected to arrive. Space for ourselves to realise that what we thought we desperately needed might not actually be what we need at all.

We don’t have to stop wanting things. We don’t have to stop trying. We don’t have to become passive passengers in our own lives. We just don’t have to exhaust ourselves trying to control every outcome.
So today, I’m trying to loosen my grip a little. To do what is mine to do and leave the rest alone. To trust that I don’t need to prove my worth to the people, places and opportunities that genuinely belong in my life.

And I’m reminding myself that something not happening on my preferred timeline doesn’t automatically mean it isn’t happening at all.

Maybe what’s meant for me is already making its way towards me.
Maybe I don’t need to know how.
Maybe I just need to leave enough space for it to arrive.

Today’s affirmation

Nova Rising Soul x